Category Archives: stuff that’s just fucking stupid

the way to end the genocide in Gaza is…

Posted on by
4

…not to vote in the 2024 election, I guess?

Well, that’s what some people seem to believe. I’m basing this on recent Bsky comments responding to my ‘voting is like taking a bus‘ analogy. Granted, the voting-bus analogy is flawed. Anytime you compare a thing to a different thing, the comparison will fall short, because (obviously) they are two separate things. Still, I think that analogy is/was useful in explaining WHY I’ll be grudgingly voting for Biden in the 2024 election. Here, briefly, is the analogy:

The U.S. government is a bus. The 2024 election is about who’ll drive the bus. If neither bus driver will take the bus directly to the place we want to be, it makes sense to choose the driver who’ll deliver us closest to where we want to be.

Several people on Bsky used the analogy to lament the choice of bus drivers and/or wish there was a better bus driver we could choose. Here are some of their responses:

— There are two buses that are driving toward hell at slightly different rates, I would like to turn around and take a bus away from hell
— If my desired destination required that the bus run over tens of thousands of innocent people to get me where I was going, I’d simply not ride that bus and find some other way to get there
— So if I want guaranteed healthcare, take the genocide bus, got it.
— why don’t we change the bus routes so the bus goes where people actually want to go instead of only going to the dump.

I don’t blame these folks. I’m not happy with the choices either, or with the system that limited our choices. Unfortunately, the system we have IS the system we have. It takes time to change an entire electoral system and, sadly, the only way to change it is by voting for people who’ll change the system (very few of which are running for national office).

For a lot of these folks, the solution is obvious. Don’t take the bus. Don’t vote. They argue that voting for Biden is essentially endorsing genocide. They say Biden’s support of genocide is so defining they can’t, in good conscience, vote for him.

These folks have an uncomfortably valid point. Here’s an exchange I had with one person:

Them: Here’s the problem with this analogy: The place I want to go is a free and safe Palestine. Not only is Biden going nowhere near there, it’s impossible to get there on one’s own.
Me: I would also like a free, safe, independent Palestine. Tell me, who should I vote for to get that? I’m willing to be convinced. Hell, I’m eager to be convinced.
Them: Neither. That’s the point.
Me: So your suggestion is…not to vote? Does that help anybody at all? Voting for either Biden or Trump–or not voting at all–isn’t going to help anybody in Gaza or the West Bank. For me, personally, there are other reasons to vote; friends & family who will suffer more under Trump. Yes, the lesser of 2 evils is still evil, but it’s less evil. I can settle for that.
Them: Well, many can’t. Either get Biden to change or deal with it.

A lot of these folks argue they’ll vote for the down ballot candidates–the members of the U.S. Congress, state legislators, local offices–but not for Biden as POTUS. But here’s the thing: POTUS sets foreign policy. Congress controls the budget, but the agenda for foreign relations is established by the president. If your primary concern is a safe, independent Palestinian state, your choices are limited to a guy who reluctantly contributed to genocide or a guy who enthusiastically endorses it.

Forget the bus analogy. Instead, think of the coming election like this: somebody is going to pound a nail through the foot of every Palestinian. You have a choice: a) a ten-penny nail, or b) a railroad spike. It’s an ugly choice. In a better world, we could choose between two leaders who want to teach Palestinians to dance. But we don’t live in that world. The best we can do right now is try to reduce the harm.

I’ll be voting for Joe Biden AND doing what I can to pressure him and Congress to stop the genocide. Yes, it’s contradictory. But Walt Whitman was right; we are large, we contain multitudes.

EDITORIAL NOTE: Biden is also significantly better than Trump on a number of issues, including the environment, labor, LGBTQ issues, voting rights, civil liberties, infrastructure, taxes, and a lot of other policy stuff. Still awful on his support for Netanyahu, but multitudes and all that.

hello sweetie

Posted on by
2

SPOILERS HERE!
THERE WILL BE SPOILERS
INITIATE SPOILER ALERT SYSTEM
ALL THE SPOILERS FIT TO PRINT

Okay, I’ve watched all three episodes (yes, I’m including The Church on Ruby Road as an episode) of the newest version of Doctor Who…and I’m concerned.

I’m not concerned about Ncuti Gatwa as The Doctor. He seems to be a natural Doctor, which perhaps is because unlike every other new Doctor, he didn’t have to go through the whole ‘Who am I this time?’ fuss. And I’m not concerned about Millie Gibson as Ruby Sunday, although she’s at risk of being perky. Nor am I concerned about the basic plot structure of these three episodes; they all seem like classic Doctor Who events. They fit perfectly in the Doctor approach as described by Neil Gaiman:

[T]here’s a blue box. It’s bigger on the inside than it is on the outside. It can go anywhere in time and space and sometimes even where it’s meant to go. And when it turns up, there’s a bloke in it called The Doctor and there will be stuff wrong and he will do his best to sort it out.

We see that in each of these three episodes. We’ve had a baby kidnapped by goblins; we’ve had babies abandoned in space who are threatened by a snot monster, and we’ve had a villain who has essentially stolen music from the world. These are all great Doctor Who scenarios—they’re all classic problems for the Doctor and Ruby to ‘sort out.’ I’m not concerned about any of this.

The goblin musical number from The Church on Ruby Road.

What I AM concerned about is the nature of the show itself. Of the three episodes so far, two of them have included musical numbers. I’m talking about incorporating theatrical singing (and dancing) as a part of the narrative (as opposed to something organic but incidental WITHIN the episode…like hearing music on the radio or a band performing). What the fuck is that about?

I’m not opposed to singing and dancing…but why? What’s the point? Did the singing and dancing contribute to the story? No. Did it develop the characters? No. This is Doctor Who filmed like Disney’s Little Mermaid or Moana. It’s turning Doctor Who into Singing in the Rain or Guys and Dolls.

The song & dance number from The Devil’s Chord

Don’t get me wrong. I like musicals. On any given day, you might find me humming or singing tunes from My Fair Lady. I’d be perfectly fine with an actual musical episode (like the brilliant Buffy the Vampire Slayer sixth season episode Once More with Feeling), but personally, I don’t want a Doctor who might, at any moment, burst into song and dance instead of acting and using dialog.

The thing is, the musical numbers in those two episodes were superfluous. They didn’t contribute to the story in any meaningful way. In fact, I’d argue they diminished the show. I’d argue they distracted the viewer from the events within the story world.

So there it is. I love Doctor Who, but I’m concerned about the direction the show is taking. I’m excited about Ncuti Gatwa as The Doctor. I think Millie Gibson as Ruby Sunday shows a lot of promise. I’ll continue to watch Doctor Who, but I’ve lost some of my enthusiasm for it. I’m uneasy about the next episodes. I hope the new relationship with Disney doesn’t result in a Disneyfied Doctor. But that seems to be a real risk.

EDITORIAL NOTE: That said, the end scene in which The Doctor and Ruby recreate the dancing on the piano moment from Tom Hanks’ movie Big while on the zebra crosswalk from the Beatles’ Abbey Road album was fucking brilliant.

naw, wasn’t zorro

Posted on by
3

According to the patriots on FreeRepublic, history has been destroyed. Again. The first time it was destroyed was in July of 2021, when the statue of…somebody, I can’t quite remember who…was removed from the Market Street Park (I think the park used to be named for a person, but nobody seems to know who that person was) in Charlottesville, North Carolina.

You may (or possibly you’re unable to) remember back in 2017 when that statue was first ordered to be removed. A group of white supremacists, neo-Confederates, neo-fascists, white nationalists, neo-Nazis, Klansmen, and far-right militias gathered in a Unite the Right rally to protest the removal. A counter-protest ended when one of the white nationalists drove his car into the crowd, killing one and wounding 35.

The statue…I think there was a horse involved, maybe?…was apparently removed (assuming it actually ever existed, who can say?) and put into storage. No reputable museum wanted to take possession of a large bronze statue of…some random guy who was maybe riding a horse. The statue was ordered to be destroyed–melted so the metal could be repurposed to create a new statue of somebody or something else.

There were a number of lawsuits opposed to the destruction of the statue of…whoever it was. Somebody with a horse; I’m certain there was a horse in it. A cowboy, maybe? Possibly a circus performer? Anyway, those lawsuits failed and recently…wait. Pony Express rider! I’m just guessing here, but that’s a real possibility.

Doesn’t matter. The lawsuits failed and just a few days ago, history was re-destroyed when the statue was melted and this person, whoever he…or she, or they (which seems more than likely because really, there’s a BIG push to remove non-binary people from history) was became completely and utterly erased from history. Nobody will ever know who they were, or what war they lost, or which nation they betrayed.

Oooh, Zorro! And his horse Tornado! I bet it was probably…but no. I remember Zorro. Don Diego de la Vega, in his mask and that wonderful sombrero cordobés, fighting valiantly against the corrupt and tyrannical officials of California. So no, not him. Whoever the statue was of, I’m guessing that person wasn’t fighting for justice.

it’s the same coin

Posted on by
2

I’m almost never busy. I don’t live a busy life. But this is one of those rare instances when I’m working under a deadline. So of course RIGHT NOW there’s a LOT of really awful and really interesting and really important stuff happening everywhere. Stuff I’d ordinarily be writing about because, as you know, I have thoughts about things.

The most awful thing is the terrorist attack by Hamas on Israeli civilians. No matter how much a person might support the rights of Palestinians, no matter how much a person might despise the treatment of Palestinians by the Israeli government, no matter how much a person might understand the frustration and anger and boiling hatred Palestinians may feel toward Israeli policies, there’s absolutely no possible justification for an attack designed to slaughter civilians. And there’s no possible reason to celebrate such an attack.

But this is why terrorism exists, and why it works. Oppressed people strike out–not directly against the government that oppresses them, because they don’t have the military power to harm the government. They strike where they can do the most damage, and they do it KNOWING it will result in two things: 1) outrage against them and their cause, and 2) a massively one-sided retaliation. The retaliation always reveals the social and political conditions that sparked the terrorism.

Right now people are talking about Gaza. Right now, a lot of people are gleeful about the demolition of Gaza, because ‘they’ deserve it. But many people are also hearing for the first time Gaza referred to as ‘the world’s largest open-air prison.’ We’re seeing in the starkest possible light, the people who allow their anger and resentment to turn to brutality–the terrorists and the retaliators.

And because I’ve said This is why terrorism exists and why it works, some people will argue that I’m validating the attack by Hamas. So let me repeat this: There’s absolutely no possible justification for an attack designed to slaughter civilians and there’s no possible reason to celebrate such an attack. I could also say–and it would be equally true–that brutal oppression works. We’ve seen that in totalitarian regimes throughout history. That’s not a justification of brutality.

Brutality works for the brutal, terrorism works for the terrorists, racism works for the racists, patriarchy works for men, cruelty works for the cruel, selfishness works for the selfish. In all cases, ordinary decent people are the ones who suffer.

This is all deeply ugly. So it’s important to remember this: the Israeli government doesn’t represent all Jews. It’s important to remember this: Hamas doesn’t represent all Palestinians. It’s critically important to understand that oppression and terrorism the opposite sides of the same coin.

EDITORIAL NOTE: We must burn the patriarchy. If you’re wondering what the patriarchy has to do with the situation in Israel and Gaza, then you don’t really grasp the extent to which patriarchy infects culture. We need to burn it to the ground, gather the ashes, piss on them, douse them in oil and set them on fire again. Burn it and keep burning it, over and over. Burn it for generations. Then nuke it from orbit. Then have tea and cookies.

bus ain’t going nowhere

Posted on by
2

There’s an article in the Politics section of this morning’s WaPo entitled Moderates could unite amid House speaker chaos. Why don’t they? The piece quotes Dan Lipinski–a conservative Democrat and former representative from Illinois–suggesting that Democrats ‘missed the opportunity to work with Republicans this week.’

This may explain why Dan Lipinski is a former representative. Republicans are actively refusing to work with Democrats. The article actually includes the answer to the question it asks; it says, GOP leaders “have so far indicated that they plan to win the job by appealing to Republicans alone.” The ‘Takes 2 to Tango’ rule applies here.

Some folks will say there are no moderate Republicans anymore. I think that’s incorrect. I think there are Republicans who’d like to be moderate, but are afraid of ‘the crazies.’ Which, in my opinion, makes them situational crazies. It also makes them cowards. As Ken Kesey said, you’re either on the bus or you’re off the bus.

Kevin McCarthy was so desperate to be the Bus Driver that he willingly handed the keys to the bus to ‘the crazies.’ Worse than that, KM made them Bus Monitors. He let them decide on the Bus Route. He allowed them to keep one hand on the steering wheel and one foot on the accelerator. And if that wasn’t enough, he gave them the authority to dismiss him as the Bus Driver if they were unhappy.

Here’s the thing about ‘the crazies’ — they’re NEVER going to be happy. Never. That’s what makes them ‘the crazies.’ for fuck’s sake.

Bus ain’t going nowhere until it gets fixed.

So here we are. The bus is parked on the side of the road. Republicans don’t want Democrats to help pick a new Bus Driver. (This is how crazy ‘the crazies’ are: the bull goose crazy, Matt Gaetz, needed the cooperation of Democrats to boot KM out of the driver’s seat for the crime of cooperating with Democrats.) To get a new Bus Driver, the non-crazy, so-called moderates think they need the cooperation of ‘the crazies’. That’s just fucking crazy.

There are 433 members of the House. 221 are Republicans, 212 are Democrats. There are no more than a dozen of what are considered ‘the crazies.’ All it would take to hire a new Bus Driver is for a handful of ‘not crazy’ Republicans to nominate somebody who is NOT actively crazy, somebody who doesn’t absolutely reject the notion of negotiating with Democrats, somebody who believes in democracy. Somebody who actually wants the bus to go forward.

It’s really pretty simple. But it’s out of the hands of the Democrats. Republicans own the bus at the moment.

Will it happen? Will the GOP actually nominate somebody who’ll get at least some minimal Democratic support?

Yeah, it will. I mean, it has to. It may take a while. But if the bus is ever going to go back into service, the GOP has to be willing to pry the keys out of the hands of ‘the crazies.’ Democrats can help, but Republicans have to tackle the bastards first.

scotus / minority report

Posted on by
12

Hey, you guys. Remember when Tom Cruise made a movie about a government bureaucracy that allowed police in the future to arrest murderers BEFORE they committed any actual murders, based entirely on the “psychic impressions” of three weird bald folks floating in a tank? Remember that? Wasn’t that cool?

Tom Cruise ain’t got a thing on the Supreme Court of the United States! SCOTUS is now making Constitutional rulings based on FUTURE EVENTS THAT HAVEN’T EVEN HAPPENED YET! I am NOT making this up.

SCOTUS Minority Report consultants

There’s this woman in Colorado, Lorie Smith, who is right now being told that IN THE FUTURE she’ll be forced to design wedding websites for some icky gay folks who will IN THE FUTURE want to get gay married. And SCOTUS has decided that she shouldn’t be forced against her will IN THE FUTURE to do this thing that she hasn’t been asked by any actual real person to do…YET.

In her defense, Lorie Smith has said she was contacted THE DAY AFTER SHE FILED HER LAWSUIT by a guy named Stewart who was totally gay and he told her, that he and Mike (also totally gay) “…are getting married early next year and would love some design work done for our invites, placenames etc. We might also stretch to a website.” But on account of her firmly held religious Christian beliefs, Ms. Smith firmly told totally gay Stewart that she would firmly NOT design any wedding website for icky gay people when they ask her to IN THE FUTURE.

Sure, IN THE PRESENT Stewart claims he’s not gay at all, and that he’s been married to a woman for like 15 years, and that he’s never asked Ms. Smith for a wedding website celebrating his icky gay marriage to this Mike person who he doesn’t even know…YET. But obviously, IN THE FUTURE Stewart will discover he’s actually completely gay and will fall in love with Mike (also gay) and they’ll decided to get icky gay married and will IN THE FUTURE ask Lorie Smith to make them a website.

But now she won’t have to do that, because Minority Report SCOTUS has consulted those bald folks in the pool and they said “Nuh uh.”

“So you’re saying Stewart will…what? Dump his wife??!!”

Ain’t science great? Unless, you’re Stewart and Mike, who won’t get to have a Lorie Smith designed website for their icky gay wedding. Also, tough beans for the current Mrs. Stewart, who’s gonna get stone dumped at some point, poor thing.

eclipsed from the public eye

Posted on by
1

Jesus suffering fuck. I’m old enough to remember when the New York Times editorial page was thoughtful and intelligent. I had to cancel my NYT subscription three or four years ago because it had become very much NOT thoughtful and intelligent. But every so often somebody will say, “Greg, old sock, take a look at this” and so I will take a look at it.

This is an actual sentence written by two actual people–Peter Baker and Michael Shear–who are PAID by NYT to write sentences:

The tale of two presidents on this spring afternoon, one quietly focused on technology policy, the other having his fingerprints taken, underscored the unique challenge that has confronted Mr. Biden since taking office more than two years ago. 

Okay, first there’s only ONE president at a time. I know this is quibbling, but these guys earn their living writing stuff, so we can legit quibble the fuck out of them. You got one president and one bullying jackass who used to be president. Get it right.

Second, Baker and Shear have somehow decided that President Uncle Joe, by NOT being fingerprinted after being arrested on 34 felony counts, faces ‘a unique challenge.’ What IS that challenge? It’s…and I swear I am not making this up…it’s that Biden is being “eclipsed in the public eye” by Comrade Trump. That’s like saying a nice sunny afternoon is being eclipsed in the public eye by an EF5 tornado. Baker and Shear seem to think that President Biden spending yesterday discussing policy issues involving artificial intelligence instead of being booked by NYPD for multiple felonies is a problem FOR BIDEN. That’s so massively stupid that the term ‘stupid’ isn’t sufficient to describe it.

Here’s another sentence from that same news ‘analysis’:

The White House made no effort to compete for attention with the arrest of a former president. 

Read that sentence twice. They’re saying the White House didn’t even TRY to wrangle the public eye away from a former POTUS doing a modified perp walk. As if Uncle Joe had somehow failed because he wasn’t standing on a stage waving his normal-sized hands and shouting, “HEY, LOOK AT ME!”. These guys are experienced White House correspondents; you’d think they’d understand President Uncle Joe wouldn’t even want to distract the public from this image.

Comrade Trump after being booked, on his way to being arraigned for 34 felonies.

Just look at that sad-ass, pouty motherfucker. Baker and Shear are apparently among those folks who believe these indictments (and the coming indictments) will somehow benefit Trump, that being charged with multiple felonies in multiple state and federal jurisdictions will lift Trump into the White House in 2024. I don’t know how to explain to these people that being formally accused of committing lots of crimes IS A BAD THING.

It’s a bad thing even for Comrade Trump. There aren’t going to be folks who think, “Man, I was going to vote for Democrats…but THEN THEY INDICTED TRUMP!!!” These indictments aren’t going to bring him any sympathy voters, they won’t bring him any NEW followers. The only people energized by this are folks who already support him, that solid carbon block of fascists and fuckwits who are convinced that being an arrogant asshole is an asset. They don’t care how many laws he’s accused of smashing, so long as he’s openly cruel to minorities and women and LGBTQ folks and those peculiar Christians who think Jesus wanted folks to love each other.

Here is a True Thing: most people can’t stand Comrade Donald Trump. Not just most people in the US; most people on the entire fucking globe. We KNOW him. We’ve dealt with bullying jackasses like him all our lives. The ONLY reason Trump has any political power at all is because twenty or thirty years ago the GOP began tapping into the bullying jackass demographic and succeeded in getting local bullying jackasses into positions of local authority. They’ve slowly rebuilt their party–from the ground up–into the party of bullying jackasses. Local bullying jackasses managed to change local laws making it easier for other bullying jackasses to get elected.

And pundits like Peter Baker and Michael Shear have helped them by shifting the emphasis away from being a bullying jackass to the ‘unique challenge’ of earnest candidates who are being ‘eclipsed from the public eye’ by…well, by pundits like Peter Baker and Michael Shear.

reasoned debate

Posted on by
Reply

MAGA Fuckwit: If you indict and arrest Trump, we will burn this motherfucker down!
America: Well, we’re still going to indict and arrest him.
MAGA Fuckwit: He did nothing wrong!
America: Sorry, disagree.
MAGA Fuckwit: The call to Georgia was perfect!
America: No, but that’s not what we’re arresting him for.
MAGA Fuckwit: The election was stolen!
America: No, but that’s not what we’re arresting him for.
MAGA Fuckwit: January 6th was a peaceful protest!
America: No, but that’s not what we’re arresting him for.
MAGA Fuckwit: As president he had the power to declassify top secret documents just by thinking about it!
America: No, but that’s not what we’re arresting him for.

Defending the Constitutional Right to Pay Hush Money to Porn Stars!

MAGA Fuckwit: He…he…whatever you say he did, he didn’t do it! Or he was right to do it!
America: We’re arresting him for illegally paying hush money to a porn star.
MAGA Fuckwit: We…that’s…you can’t…we will burn this…c’mon!
America: Yeah, that’s it. Hush money, porn star.
MAGA Fuckwit: That’s not illegal!
America: Yeah, it is if you try to pass it off as a campaign contribution.
MAGA Fuckwit: He did it to protect his wife and kids!
America: Yeah, no.
MAGA Fuckwit: Real men cheat on their wives!
America: Seriously? That’s your argument?
MAGA Fuckwit: Goddamnit!
America: [shrugs]
MAGA Fuckwit: Can’t you indict and arrest him for the other crimes?!
America: Sure. Just wait.
MAGA Fuckwit: Okay, good, then we will burn this motherfucker down!
America: We’ll let you know when we’re ready.